No-Cumment: Korina Sanchez Apologizes for "Dark and Small" Spirits Remark!

By Armand Dean Nocum

The Presidential Commission on Good Government's proposal to put on display the $20 million worth of jewelries taken by US customs officials from the Marcoses when they fled to Hawaii will not sit well with human rights victims. Displaying the eye-popping hoard of 400 sets of jewelries amassed by former First Lady Imelda Marcos in a museum may attract international tourists, but the tourism earnings there are not worth the insult to Filipinos!

 Displaying them would only tell the world how bad our justice system is and how Filipinos have not advanced as nation to enable us to put our criminals behind bars! How then would we explain to tourists the fact that although they were caught robbing us blind, we still elected Sen. Bongbong Marcos and Rep. Imelda to the Senate and Congress, respectively?

Well, the only good thing about Rep. Imelda getting elected in Congress is that she gives Congress its rightful name: The Lower House! Can you go any lower than that?

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Reacting to the proposal of the  Presidential Commission on Good Government to make a tourist attraction of the Marcos jewelries, Sen. Ferdinand Marcos Jr. Senator Marcos noted, however, that his mother once complained that there were many pieces missing after reading a list of her seized jewelry provided by the PCGG.

“I have no idea how many pieces are no longer accounted for but when we once asked for the list from the PCGG, my mother noted that many were not on the list,” Marcos said in a report at the Philippine Inquirer.

“The question she asked was ‘Bakit konti na lang ‘yun?’” the senator added.

Well, now Rep. Marcos and Sen. Bongbong feel how it is to be robbed. Robbers robbing robbers? Only in the Philippines!

Hey! Why display the Marcos jewelries to earn money? We already have the biggest attraction to world tourists – Philippine Politics! Ask Sen. Tito Sotto, he can beat Americans in the reading of the former US Sen. Robert F. Kennedy's speech in Pilipino! Truly Wow Philippines!

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Asked whether he has special memory about any of the jewelries, Sen. Marcos said he has none, except to remember that his dad gave them to his mom.

 “I know it’s valuable and beautiful. I recall some pieces that my dad gave my mother on her birthday or at Christmas. I’m sure she can tell you which ones,” the senator told Senate reporters.

Wow! Iba na talaga ang mayayaman, di lang man nila maalala yung mga brillantes nila (The rich are really different from us, they cannot recall memories of their gems). Well, I understand Sen. Marcos, it’s just humanly impossible to recall all 400 jewelries – more so if you don’t know where they came from.

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The newspapers are also screaming about the decision of ABS-CBN network to investigate the on-air statements of broadcaster Korina Sanchez about “dark and small malignant spirits” interested in taking the DILG post now occupied by husband Interior Secretary Mar Roxas.

Hey guys, don’t forget to tap “albularyos (quack doctors)” or spirit warriors in your investigation!

But if I were Korina’s public relations (PR) adviser, I will tell her and her lawyer to use this press statement as a defense: “I apologize for the lapse in judgment. I am sorry to have offended the sensibilities of the people of Capiz, some of whom I suspected to be putting a spell on my husband from the time he represented the congressional district there to the time he married me. But I would like to assure the people of Capiz I am not making a general statement. When I referred to ‘dark and malignant spirits,’ I was only referring to some mangkukulam (witch/ shaman) there!”

“Definitely, I was not referring to Vice President Jejomar Binay. I can’t help it if he felt alluded to. I will reveal the name of the magkukulam in my show Korina Ngayon! Abangan!”

Of course this is a joke, no offense meant to the people of Capiz, to Korina or Vice President Binay!

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International news headlines scream: “Topless women dance for Swazi king to celebrate virginity! (The Philippine Star).”

I am tempted to say many things, pero No-Cumment na lang ako diyan hehe! See you guys in Swazi! Wow Swazi!

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There you have it guys! I’ve done it! I formally revived my old “No-Cumment” column that I’ve used to keep at the defunct newspaper “The Morning Times” in Zamboanga City years ago. I hope you enjoyed what will be the start of my series of “Nocum-mentaries!”

Feel free to share, re-post and email it to friends. My media friends are also free to print it in the papers or blogs. Just don’t forget to attribute it to the author dahil pinag-paguran ko ito at di kopya (I toiled hard for this and did not copy).

If you copy, isumbong ko kayo ke Sen. Sotto …